But let me be honest, I do not read my Bible every single day. As a matter of fact, a habitual nature has transpired in my life that I'm not necessarily a fan of. Unfortunately, it takes me to be on the verge of a depression episode or it takes my life to be in absolute chaos in order to sit down with my Bible and let God teach me a lesson in life.
I have always felt guilty about this but then learned that I am not the only one who has this habit. This opened my mind and heart up to learning about this issue, why I believe it happens, and what can be done to fix it.
God is the only dad I got, so let's see if I can make Him proud ;)
I believe this happens due to pride and shame. I do NOT believe that lack of time has anything to do with it. I certainly have used this reason but eventually got real with myself and admitted that it was just an excuse.
I think that it is simply human nature that has the confident idea that we don't need to turn to God's word because it is our Earthly responsibility to take care of the problems in our lives. I believe this attitude is especially true when it comes to problems that effect our families. I also believe that impatience is a key factor as into why we avoid the Bible at all costs until we are desperate.
We want to fix it, we want control, waiting on God says to others "I am incapable" and in return it boomerangs back to is in a form of pride. Let's get honest, we have all been there and done that, let's stop pretending!! Christianity is full of fakes but it's not where the tolerance should rest!!
Shame is also a reason I believe that we don't turn to God's Word when our lives aren't in shambles. I think that most people mistake this shame for fear. Shame tells us that we should feel bad for what we do and holds us captivity. When we experience shame we keep to ourselves and withhold our feelings and genuine thoughts as well as vulnerabilities.
When life is going great and not as stressful I believe there are some people out there who feel it unnecessary to turn to their Bibles because it may show weakness or perhaps open the door to it. People are funny that way but especially those who suffer from anxiety, I totally understand why they would rather avoid it all together.
I myself personally have used the excuse I don't have the time to, rather quickly I'm always faced with the reality that all I need to do is make time. I have been ashamed to face Him, not out of fear but because it's out of pride. Recently I took a stand to not withhold myself or wait until turmoil to soak in His word!! When I started the journey of breaking this habit, my Biblical study began in Deuteronomy. As I'm reading I came across these passages of scriptures
Deuteronomy 4:29-31
29 But from there you will seek the Lord your God and you will find him, if you search after him with all your heart and with all your soul. 30 When you are in tribulation, and all these things come upon you in the latter days, you will return to the Lord your God and obey his voice. 31 For the Lord your God is a merciful God. He will not leave you or destroy you or forget the covenant with your fathers that he swore to them.
After reading this, my heart was overwhelmed with the sensation of grace and mercy!! This verse shows that God EXPECTS us to have this nature, that after we know Him in our hearts and give our full selves over to Him, that we will truly come to Him and genuinely obey His word when our lives are in tribulation.
The truth is that God made us, He knows us, and before He required us to be forgiven by Jesus' blood to have salvation of our sins God knew that this would be the nature of man kind. God could have chose to pardon us for this habit, instead He promised to be MERCIFUL towards us!!!
This set of scripture really brought me peace as well as helped me to not become as hard on myself as I have been in the past over this thing that I do. My prayer is that others will find comfort in this too and feel less guilty, less shame, and less pride. Yes we should make time for God each day and yes there are many who don't unless their lives depend on it.
But the self pity, feelings of unworthiness, and lack of confidence in ourselves because of it starts NOW!!
Recently I set out on a mission to break that habit, to officially conquer Satan's tricks and dangling mistletoe over my head for one last kiss.
I challenge you to do the same!
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